I have so many questions, so many things I want to scream at you, shake you, didn't you know I was here?! I would have stayed up all night while you cried, while you told me why the world wasn't someplace you wanted to be, I would have sacrificed everything I had, every single night, every day, every hour, every minute. Every breath.
That text. That one text. And I didn't know what it meant. I didn't fix you, I didn't rescue you WHY DIDN'T I SAVE YOU. You are so beautiful. You are so smart. Why don't you see? I am absolutely begging you on bloody knees to see. What is inside you that hurts so badly that you have to hurt yourself, hate yourself?
I love you more than anything in this whole world.
You are my whole wide world. Please hang on. I am a selfish weak human but you are rainbow and you are crystal and you are all that is good in this world and I need you. You are the light of my life, the person I brag about, the reason I am proud to carry the name I carry.
I'm listening to her talk about the note. The rum. The blood. There was so much blood. There are hushed whispers of things they don't want me to know. I can't know.
Please know I love you. Please know I can't live without you. Please know I will never ever leave your side. Please know I don't know what I feel right now. Please just stay with me. I am begging you.
You are my angel. My hero. I revered you before this. Now, you are a survivor as well. That's all. Survive with me my angel.
- Who do I have to hurt to make you want this world again?